by Chris Helder.

Positive thinking doesn’t work. Not really. Imagine if I walked up to someone who was struggling or who had the worst year of their life and I tried to encourage them by saying, “Come on, just be positive!” What would be the result? I imagine they would want to punch me in the face.

Not only that, but there are numerous studies that show that if you lay in bed in the morning and say to yourself, “Come on, try to be positive today. You can do it.” When 10 o’clock rolls around and you don’t feel positive anymore, you actually feel worse than when you started! Let me introduce you to the ideas of Useful Actions and Beliefs.

Useful Actions And Beliefs.

If you had the worst year of your life and you needed clarity on how to pull yourself out of the rut, ask yourself simple questions. “What is the most useful thing for me to do to get from ground zero to two? What is the most useful thing for me to do to get from two to five?” If you had a great year, “What is the most useful thing for me to do to get from seven to nine?” Instantly, you begin to identify the actions that you need to take to get to the next level. Positive thinking is a feeling. It can be a fleeting thought. This is better because it is about taking action and having a strategy to solve the problem.

The next level is Useful Belief. To demonstrate this, I want to use an example of parents that I hear all the time. They say things like, “I can’t believe these kids today. With their video games and computers, they are not doing the things that I did when I was a kid. I played outside. I had a stick and a ball and I was happy!” We’ve all heard them. People ask me, “Chris, what do you think about kids today?”

“I believe this is the greatest generation of kids ever,” I say. “I believe this is the best time to be a parent in the history of the world.” By the way… is that true? I’m not really sure if it’s true or not. You know what, though? When I believe that, I am a better dad, I am more present and will come up with more ideas about how to be a good father. Truth doesn’t matter as much as having a useful perception about your individual reality. How does this work?

Red Toyota Theory.

Your brain has something called the Reticular Activating System. It is often referred to as the R.A.S. It is the filter that sorts through all of the information you get every day and decides what you will notice and what you won’t. Let me ask you a question. How many Red Toyotas did you see on your way into work today? The answer is probably zero. That is because you were not looking for Red Toyotas.

However, if you decided to buy a Red Toyota, you would start to see Red Toyotas everywhere. That is because your R.A.S. would be dialled in to these cars. It is no different with the belief you have about your life. This is the best time to be alive! This is the best age to be! There is opportunity everywhere! Those are useful beliefs and your R.A.S. will go find the beauty in the world to support it!

The most important words you say all day are the words that you say to yourself, about yourself when you are alone by yourself. Most people do not have useful language about their reality. I see so many people frustrated with the things that they cannot change. Decide to have a useful belief about those things you cannot change. Then dial up your Red Toyota Theory to believe in all of the opportunity that stares you in the face every day. Believe there is opportunity out there and send your brain on a mission of discovery to find it all.

Chris Helder is one of the world’s most outstanding speakers on the topic of communication, leadership and influence. He is the author of the newly released book Useful Belief: Because it’s better than positive thinking and the best-selling book The Ultimate Book of Influence. Visit chrishelder.com